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Gillette Man

O Gillete Man, your chin is so smooth,
There's no way the girls can resist you.
Your hair it shines,
Your teeth are so white,
Their gleaming and glowing
It lights up the night.
Your chest has got just the right amount of hair
With fine big muscles built up there.
Your shoulders are broad, your nose is just right,
All the girls reckon you're just as cool as ice.
And So
Do
I

Oh I want to be like Gillette Man.

That beautiful girl I saw you with on TV,
If I was like you do you reckon she'd go for me?
Would she snuggle up beside me with hot cups of tea?
We'd sit and swap stories until quarter to three.
I'd dazzle everyone with my rapier wit
And I bet no-one would ever give me shit.
So tell me Gillette Man, how'd you get to be
Just like you when I'm just plain old me?
It's Just
Not
Fair

And if I was like you
There's nothing I couldn't do,
If I could get my chin that smooth.
If I could get my jaw that square,
I could go anywhere.

Oh I want to be like Gillette Man.